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Me and My Anti-Progress

Anna Nalick's song "Breathe" has a line that sums up me. It goes:

"These mistakes you make you'll just make them again
If you only try turning around."

It's been a rough year for us financially. On the home front, our heating-and-air unit crapped out to the tune of $5,000 and our roof started leaking. Add to that, my dad had major surgery three hours away, and during his nearly three-week recovery time, I spent a lot of money on gas, hotel rooms and dining out. Then, after he was released and was home just a little more than a week, he got a bad blood infection and wound up right back in the same hospital again for another three or four weeks. (He's doing well now.)

The thing of it is, though, is that when tough times hit -- and they don't even have to be as tough as this year has been -- it becomes very easy for me to say, "Well, if I gotta charge A, then what's the harm in charging B, too?" Then, before you know it, I've charged right through the entire alphabet.

I need to find a way to stop just "turning around." Each time I make some progress, I allow anything to serve as an excuse for every bit of good I do to just be sucked away.
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